When Fighting For Freedom, Never Wear Your Best Pants

“Scotty,” the Captain’s disembodied voice said over the communications channel. “Four to beam up.”

“Aye, Cap’n,” Scotty acknowledged from his seat behind the console.

“And Scotty, ask someone to bring us blankets,” Kirk requested. His voice was firm, absent the tone which generally meant all hell had broken loose. The transmissions from the planet had been intermittent at best, the reports during the three days that they had been on the planet involved in the talks not as regular as required. But there was some subspace interference that Uhura could not overcome, not even with Spock’s assistance.

“Blankets, sir?”

“Just get them. And beam us up,” Kirk repeated, some urgency leaking through.

“Aye sir. Energizing now,” Scotty confirmed, activating the controls. The lights shimmered and swirled until they solidified into four people, four people who had clearly been exposed to some sort of hostilities.

Sulu and Chekov moved to stand directly in front of the Captain who was uncharacteristically at the back of the transporter rather than at the front. Commander Giotto moved to stand before the three men, a look of stern disapproval plastered on his face.

“Ensign Blackwell, you are excused,” Giotto ordered. The ensign nodded and left but only reluctantly. “Blankets?” he barked at Scotty.

“They have not gotten here yet,” Scotty responded, rounding the dividing wall to look more closely at the four men. Giotto’s face was smeared with dirt, one sleeve of his uniform missing, his pants showing holes in both knees. Chekov’s face was even dirtier, his curls sticking up all over his head, eyes wide and showing some fear. His shirt had gone half missing, the flat collar the only thing holding it on at all. The right leg of his pants was in tatters, strips of material hanging loosely over his boot. Sulu’s hair was also in complete disarray, the left arm of his shirt and left leg of his pants gone, only threads sticking out from where they once resided. The missing pant leg revealed more skin that it should have done, Sulu bare underneath what remained of his trousers.

The Captain seemed to be standing completely still behind the other three men. Scotty wasn’t even sure he was breathing. The boundless energy that ordinarily defined him was conspicuously absent.

“Cap’n,” Scotty said, concern coloring his tone. “Are ye all right, sir?”

“I’m… uhm… fine, Scotty. Can you find out where those blankets are?”

“Aye sir,” Scotty agreed, turning to activate the communications panel. He was stopped when Spock calmly entered the transporter room followed by an anxious Dr. McCoy.

“What the hell happened?” McCoy demanded. His arms were full of blankets, his eyes searching the away team. “Are y’all okay? Who’s injured? Is this everybody that went down?”

“Bones,” Jim said firmly. “Please give me a blanket then we’ll answer all your questions.”

McCoy frowned at that but mounted the transporter steps to get closer to the source of the Captain’s voice. He stopped when he saw Jim, his mouth hanging open. “Why the hell are you naked?”

Jim instead of answering, he reached for one of the blankets and wrapped it as tightly around him as possible. “We were caught in a tribal dispute. We’re okay. Our uniforms are toast but we’re unharmed.”

“There is unrest on the planet, sir?” Spock asked in his calm manner. “There were no reports of hostilities.”

“The reports are wrong, Commander,” Giotto informed him unnecessarily. After Chekov and Sulu wrapped themselves in two of the remaining blankets, they all left the pad. “We were talking with the tribal elders when they came under attack. They did everything they could to protect us but we had to flee the area.”

“How did Jim end up naked? Do I even want to know?” Bones demanded as he scanned the members of the away team.

“You probably don’t,” Jim said, swatting away Bones’ hand that held the scanner. “I’m fine. I just need a shower and a new uniform.”

“Sam, your knees okay?” Bones asked, scanning the Security Chief with a frown. Not that a frown wasn’t his usual expression but this one seemed more focused and not simply because.

“I’m fine, Leonard. None of us are injured. Our pride, maybe. Not physically,” Sam told him firmly but more kindly than normal.

“Okay,” Bones said, nodding. “You are all relieved of duty until tomorrow.” He held his hand up at Jim’s protests. “I know you are fine. You’re also exhausted. And you need to shower and to rest. And I mean rest, dammit.”

“Fine,” Jim huffed, pulling the blanket more tightly around him. “Scotty, take the Bridge until beta starts. Spock, you’re with me.”

“Of course, sir,” Spock agreed, trying to look like everyone there didn’t know what he was with the Captain for.

“Reminds me of one of my Oma’s sayings,” Sam said to no one in particular. “When fighting for freedom, never wear your best pants.”

“Oh she did not,” Bones laughed, shaking his head.

“Yep. Grandmother Giotto was wise. Very wise,” Sam said as he followed the others out of the transporter room where they went to their quarters to shower and get some much deserved rest.